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It is hard being on the road over 200 nights a year...away from your family, isolated in many ways. It definitely isn't for everyone. This blogs represents the thoughts of just one such person. Read along and find out if the road is for you.
This is my new blogchalk:
United States, Georgia, Gainesville, Unity of Gainesville, English, John, Male, reading, RE Investing. :)
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Thursday, October 10, 2002
It is still the same old story! No 1 Ago yet for today, but I will get it done.
It looks to be another long night for some reason. I am at LaGuardia and my flight is going to be late getting off (why am I not surprised since this is THE most often route in the country?). But as luck would have it, that has been the hardest part of the day.
Actually, today has been enjoyable in some parts, because the stuff this client brought me here to do was literally a breeze to fix. In fact, when the problems are this minor I wonder why they even have me come. But I am glad they do and since I have a long relationship with these folks, it is always fun to come. On the other hand, watching this business go from $8M to $6M to $4M is a little hard to watch. I don't know why, but I do take ownership in my repeat clients business. That is to say that I treat them and say things like I had an equity ownership in the place. As another client told me recently, "that is the reason we keep bringing you back!" So today I told one of the owners (two brothers who have a high dislike for each other) that he needs to remove himself from behind the desk, stop doing the minial tasks that could be accomplished by someone for far less money and get out there and sell something. He told me he really enjoyed our technology. My response was that he wasn't making any money as long as sat behind the desk. We will see what happens. I used to go to these folks monthly, then every other month, but I have a feeling they are going to want me back more often.
Other than that, my time or lack of it is the challenge. I guess because there are a few days before the vacation kicks in, that I am trying to tie up all my loose ends (and it seems like they are endless!) before I hit the road for fun in the sun of Puerto Rico. I have to finish up last month's report for a client I am going to see tomorrow and continue to remotely coordinate a birthday party for Saturday. But stretched for time as I am, it seems to be coming together with alot of help from folks that are "on the scene".
I am giving serious thought to getting a part time business that I can run over the web started. That will do a couple of things for me. One it will generate some cash flow and that is always a good thing. With luck, I think I can equal my current income or at least come close to it by spring. And that would allow me to really chase the coffee house and quite Da Company by my projected departure date.
I will try to get my 1 Ago done later. But people are staring meanly over my shoulder while I am here in Delta's Crowne Room wanting to use this computer. I will write more, but later.
posted by John Panico at 7:08 PM
If it is green, it’s biology.
If it stinks, it’s chemistry.
If it has numbers, it’s math.
If it doesn’t work, it’s technology.
No 1 Ago today. Tomorrow's is a good one however.
Well, I have probably ticked off someone else with this blog. Oh well. I didn’t do this blog to please everyone. I recently gave the blog address to someone and knew that it might cause a problem. But if I meant what I wrote, why not let them read it?
I am not as tired today as I was yesterday. The client’s new system admin is a bit trying at times, but hey, I don’t work there. (Although, I was told that something could be worked out if I was interested.)
I thought I might hear from Lynette today. I sent a plant to her new place of work to wish her well. Oh well.
I have been fortunate to sell clients some time this month. I added a couple of days from my client last week (even though I can’t go back there because of prior commitments) and an extra visit back here to New York if Da Company can move a couple of days.
I was talking with the owner of the business that I was at today. I always thought he was a pretty smart guy. (He is the exception, since I am not quite sure how most of the owners I visit make the money they do. They are certainly not the brightest crayons in the box in general.) But Len is different. He reads…a lot. Much more than I do and I try to put a book down a week if possible. I at least down a couple of magazines and daily newspapers. Len was telling me about Carlos Castaneda who is thought of as a new age type author. I guess I should read it and surprise him on my next visit. Maybe I will pick a book up next week for vacation.
I am kind of lonely and bored this evening. I got off work a little later than normal and headed back to the room. That was about 6:15. I got on the computer and played a little before grabbing a quick bite at 8. It is after 10 now and I know I have some work, but just don’t have the energy for it.
posted by John Panico at 3:35 AM
Wednesday, October 09, 2002
What am I doing here? (1 Ago)
There are times when all of a sudden, you stop and ask yourself if you are really making a difference in the things that you touch in life such as:
- your professional life.
- your personal life.
- your spiritual life.
- your social life.
I suppose what it comes down to is this. Shouldn’t I know what my purpose on this earth is at this point in my life? Why am I here and what should I be doing?
Why do I feel that way? I wish I knew, but I don’t. Something just seems my life is a little out of kilter. I have had a feeling many times in my life that my life timing is a little behind what it could/should be. My life is seemingly coming a little too late to any party I come to. Perhaps my thoughts are too focused on what I could have rather than what I do have. Either way, it can give you a complex.
I try to live in the moment; because that is really the only thing we have…this very moment. And we should try to maximize that moment because it is only here for a second and then it is gone…on to the next moment. But obviously there are times I don’t.
I can’t even say what has brought these thoughts on, but they are here. I have heard some disturbing comments that are happening at Da Company. In that regard, I don’t want to be the last one leaving the party, so maybe I should be really pushing for my other goals. But with the schedule I have, how do you push harder on things you have to physically be there to pursue?
That is going to be the challenge over the next few months. I haven’t altered the goal of leaving Da Company by May/June of next year (perhaps I should stay through June to get an extra bonus that has been offered), but as I told Lynette the other night, money isn’t or shouldn’t be our primary drive in life.
posted by John Panico at 6:57 AM
Monday, October 07, 2002
She is gone! (1 Ago
Talk about your stunners! I received an email from Lynette today saying she has left Da Company. You could have knocked me over with a feather. I neither anticipated nor expected her sudden (or otherwise) departure. But on the other hand, I am not totally surprised either. Her position was thankless in many ways and high pressure in every way.
Her job is one of the things that brought us closer together in what seems like a couple of lifetimes ago. She was unhappy with her boss, but was locked into the income that her job provided. We would have long conversations on what are the important things in life for her. She would tell me how I reminded her of her brother Nick. What kind of things? Putting balance in your life. How money shouldn’t be the drive, that your bliss is far more important. Things like that. From those conversations, we grew close, very close.
I could go on about what transpired between us, but what good would it serve? Since our self-imposed separation, we haven’t spoken that much on a person level. Maybe each of us was afraid of what might lie ahead if we did. Maybe we know what would happen. On some level, I have a life long bond with this woman. And maybe even deeper feelings than that. I think about her regularly. Suffice to say that I will miss her greatly.
I need to start concentrating on billing, because I just bought a camcorder and spend about twice what I had thought I would, but didn’t want to skimp on it either. Add that to the vacation next week (V – 10 days and counting) and it is getting to be a pricey month. $1,100 for the camera, $900 for the room, $400 for a shuttle flight, and then food/fun/trinkets and $3,500 isn’t out of the question. (That is probably Neil and Jenny’s average bonus check.)
I am in New York for most of the week. Three days at one client and 1 day at a former regular client followed by Friday spent at my client from hell in the Atlanta area. These folks hired a new System Administrator. I guess they couldn’t wait for me forever, however the Controller said the door was open if I was still interested. I have too much to think about to think about this opportunity though. Maybe Natasha will have something come up that she isn’t interested in.
On the other hand, maybe I should be significantly more proactive on my job search. They just hired one more consultant and are looking for one more. Are they trying to send a message (I am getting it, I am getting it.)? I guess I get confused when Da Company makes these types of moves. Do they realize how they talk out of both sides of their mouth? (Why do I even broach the question, I know they don’t!)
I am getting ready to make a few changes to the site. Add some pictures and change the name as well. For a while I was enamored with “Thinking Out Loud”. But now, I am inclined to go with John’s Journey. Tell me what you think.
By the way, have you checked out Monday's Mission yet?
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